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James Krise's avatar

I wish I had read this essay 20 years ago. Very vulnerable and self-aware. Thank you for sharing.

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OliveTree's avatar

This was a really human and thought provoking read which couldn’t have achieved that without such honest reflection. I really enjoyed reading a book years back that you’ve just reminded me of called It Didn’t Start With You. Anyway, thank you for this !

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Michele Peters's avatar

"But perfectionism is just another kind of fear." Thank you, Shanetta.

This resonated. I come from generations of mothers leaving daughters. The pain shaped so much of my life. I broke the cycle, but spent years trying to be perfect as a mom, and in everything I did. (Early parenting classes and therapy helped.)

Only later in life have I started learning to love myself as I am, imperfections and all. F*ck shame.

I hope I’ve given my adult children the space to love themselves sooner than I did.

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