Stunning. This is everything creative non-fiction (I'm assuming this is in that genre) should be. The title grabbed me immediately. (I was on the way to post something that needed immediate attention, and despite feeling that urgency, I kept reading.) After the first the few sentences I couldn't stop even if I wanted to. This is so incredibly well-crafted. It struck me on a deep level, even though my own experience is somewhat the opposite. I could go on for an hour discussing this piece, but I'll leave by saying that this is what great literature does. I'm inspired.
I don't want to say "I love this" when a piece is about suffering or trauma, but your writing is stunning and the clarity you share with such deep vulnerability is beautiful. As someone who once also needed to live quiet or small, I feel understood. As a writer, I'm inspired. Thank you 💜
I really enjoyed this piece. I love the metaphor of the broken glass… How we can work to salvage something broken, but it is broken nonetheless. Beautiful.
This piece holds so much tension in what isn’t said. The quiet, the arranging, the beauty as a form of self-protection feels devastatingly precise. The metaphor of breakage here isn’t decorative, it’s cumulative, and by the end it’s clear that leaving wasn’t sudden at all. It was recognition. The refusal to keep treating damage as something that can be made invisible reads as an act of survival, not abandonment.
An incredibly powerful piece. The broken glass can be interpreted in so many ways- intended and expanded. When I attended various psychology seminars, presenters often made the point that trauma can make a person strong in the broken places. In “ A Farewell to Arms” Hemingway writes that the world may break us, but make us stronger at the broken places. Leonard Cohen in “ Anthem” writes that the broken places are where the light gets in. Thes are not exact quotes but are such rich metaphors. I hope hat the light gets in and that you are stronger in the broken places.
Elizabeth, you just mentioned two quotes that got me through the worst time of my life. Coincidentally, I just made mugs on Etsy with Hemingway's quote. (The quote varies on the web, but here is the version that seems closest to the original: "The world breaks everyone, and afterward, many are strong at the broken places." Leonard Cohen's "Anthem" is one of my absolute favorite songs. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c8-BT6y_wYg
As a queer divorcee of a queer Jew I get exactly where you were at that time. My ex literally threw me out of our 22 year marriage with 7 bags of clothes and my smaller walker as she put a hotel lock on the door so I couldn't come back without her say so.
THe broken glass was intergal to our Civil Union after 9/11, symbolizing her finality with her first wife. In hindsight, if 9/11 hadn't happened, we never would have gotten married.
But I've glued my life back together after being literally homeless for 4 1/2 months and she had me served divorce papers 1 week after I registered with the electric company and her lawyer got my address.
"When my husband smashed the table, this is what I did: nothing. Well, not nothing. I turned my face into a plate, made clean of all scraps. No emotion leftovers. I made “all gone.” Eyes clear, like bone china moons."
Jazmine, you had me hooked from the very first paragraph. I am so very glad you survived the shattering.
This glimpse into the space between done and gone is powerful. Loved all of the broken imagery and a wife's dedication to knowing her husband's culture.
I too really appreciated that once something is broken, it can never go back to the way it was before that happened. It reminds me of when my husband said an extremely hurtful, verbally abusive remark to me. He thought he could apologize and everything would be fine, as if it never happened. I never ever forgot what he said. I eventually found the courage to leave my marriage too.
Stunning. This is everything creative non-fiction (I'm assuming this is in that genre) should be. The title grabbed me immediately. (I was on the way to post something that needed immediate attention, and despite feeling that urgency, I kept reading.) After the first the few sentences I couldn't stop even if I wanted to. This is so incredibly well-crafted. It struck me on a deep level, even though my own experience is somewhat the opposite. I could go on for an hour discussing this piece, but I'll leave by saying that this is what great literature does. I'm inspired.
Wow, Billie. Just wow. Thank you. 🤍
Brava for completing the circle and knowing when to leave.
Thank you. 🤍
Regina! I'd like to introduce you to Jazmine! I love that you found each other on Substack. xoxoxo
Super. Love small world connects. Just started following Jazmine.
I don't want to say "I love this" when a piece is about suffering or trauma, but your writing is stunning and the clarity you share with such deep vulnerability is beautiful. As someone who once also needed to live quiet or small, I feel understood. As a writer, I'm inspired. Thank you 💜
Oh, thank you, Laili. That means so much. 🤍
I really enjoyed this piece. I love the metaphor of the broken glass… How we can work to salvage something broken, but it is broken nonetheless. Beautiful.
This piece holds so much tension in what isn’t said. The quiet, the arranging, the beauty as a form of self-protection feels devastatingly precise. The metaphor of breakage here isn’t decorative, it’s cumulative, and by the end it’s clear that leaving wasn’t sudden at all. It was recognition. The refusal to keep treating damage as something that can be made invisible reads as an act of survival, not abandonment.
Thank you. 🤍
This is the type of writing that inspires me as a writer. Thank you so much for writing it. And I’m so happy that you’re building a life anew❤️
We love to hear that Open Secrets essays inspire other writers!
Thank you. Sometimes the hardest writing is the most important.
An incredibly powerful piece. The broken glass can be interpreted in so many ways- intended and expanded. When I attended various psychology seminars, presenters often made the point that trauma can make a person strong in the broken places. In “ A Farewell to Arms” Hemingway writes that the world may break us, but make us stronger at the broken places. Leonard Cohen in “ Anthem” writes that the broken places are where the light gets in. Thes are not exact quotes but are such rich metaphors. I hope hat the light gets in and that you are stronger in the broken places.
Elizabeth, you just mentioned two quotes that got me through the worst time of my life. Coincidentally, I just made mugs on Etsy with Hemingway's quote. (The quote varies on the web, but here is the version that seems closest to the original: "The world breaks everyone, and afterward, many are strong at the broken places." Leonard Cohen's "Anthem" is one of my absolute favorite songs. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c8-BT6y_wYg
As a queer divorcee of a queer Jew I get exactly where you were at that time. My ex literally threw me out of our 22 year marriage with 7 bags of clothes and my smaller walker as she put a hotel lock on the door so I couldn't come back without her say so.
THe broken glass was intergal to our Civil Union after 9/11, symbolizing her finality with her first wife. In hindsight, if 9/11 hadn't happened, we never would have gotten married.
But I've glued my life back together after being literally homeless for 4 1/2 months and she had me served divorce papers 1 week after I registered with the electric company and her lawyer got my address.
Wrenchingly beautiful. From the shards, you made something wholly your own.
What a gorgeous way of putting it. Yes. ❤️
"When my husband smashed the table, this is what I did: nothing. Well, not nothing. I turned my face into a plate, made clean of all scraps. No emotion leftovers. I made “all gone.” Eyes clear, like bone china moons."
Jazmine, you had me hooked from the very first paragraph. I am so very glad you survived the shattering.
This is such a stunning piece. I don't have the words.
Thank you. Truly. 🤍
I'm so happy you escaped...I fled with my 11 month old in tow...xo
Likewise. Good job! Getting out is nothing short of warrior strength. 🤍
This glimpse into the space between done and gone is powerful. Loved all of the broken imagery and a wife's dedication to knowing her husband's culture.
Thank you. 🤍
I too really appreciated that once something is broken, it can never go back to the way it was before that happened. It reminds me of when my husband said an extremely hurtful, verbally abusive remark to me. He thought he could apologize and everything would be fine, as if it never happened. I never ever forgot what he said. I eventually found the courage to leave my marriage too.
Exactly. Those words can never be unsaid.
Sorry to tell you what you probably already know, your husband is a narcissist.
Yep. I believe you’re right.
This is stunning writing, and a powerful piece. The description of the two contrasting 'loops' took my breath away!