Thanks for posting this piece. There are many types of family secrets. Being the child of a spy is one that tends to stay in the shadows. Always glad to see it out in the open!
Thanks for sharing. You mentioned it in your piece that your dad lied to you to protect you.
That is true in my own experience - it’s so someone else doesn’t have to walk around with the same burden as the CIA officer. It is also to protect CIA sources (the foreign individuals that CIA officers recruit to provide secrets to the US Government). If those individuals are seen as meeting with a known CIA officer, the penalty can be death.
Lying can be noble in a dangerous world where many seek to do us and our loved ones harm. It can also be taken too far. Most CIA officers I know wrestled with this and tried to strike the right balance.
I appreciate your comment so much. I think it is such a murky situation. I remember asking my dad once when he planned to tell me and my sister. He said there really was no "perfect time." So true. It throws the officer into such a liminal space. I can appreciate how hard it is to strike that elusive balance.
Thank you for sharing this piece. My grandfather worked for the CIA, and this reminded me of the stories by mother used to tell about him. It’s was a very unsettling way to grow up, and it affected the choices she made later in life when she became a parent herself.
It can take generations to undo a legacy of secrets and silence. This was very validating to read and helps me understand my mother better. Thank you.
Thanks for posting this piece. There are many types of family secrets. Being the child of a spy is one that tends to stay in the shadows. Always glad to see it out in the open!
Thanks for sharing Leslie's story. As another fellow spy kid, I relate all too well.
Thanks for sharing. You mentioned it in your piece that your dad lied to you to protect you.
That is true in my own experience - it’s so someone else doesn’t have to walk around with the same burden as the CIA officer. It is also to protect CIA sources (the foreign individuals that CIA officers recruit to provide secrets to the US Government). If those individuals are seen as meeting with a known CIA officer, the penalty can be death.
Lying can be noble in a dangerous world where many seek to do us and our loved ones harm. It can also be taken too far. Most CIA officers I know wrestled with this and tried to strike the right balance.
I appreciate your comment so much. I think it is such a murky situation. I remember asking my dad once when he planned to tell me and my sister. He said there really was no "perfect time." So true. It throws the officer into such a liminal space. I can appreciate how hard it is to strike that elusive balance.
Thank you for sharing this piece. My grandfather worked for the CIA, and this reminded me of the stories by mother used to tell about him. It’s was a very unsettling way to grow up, and it affected the choices she made later in life when she became a parent herself.
It can take generations to undo a legacy of secrets and silence. This was very validating to read and helps me understand my mother better. Thank you.
Thanks for your thoughtful comment. Yes, so true - it can take generations to undo the legacy of secrets and silence. But it is always worth it.
Beautifully written!
Thanks for reading!