What a powerful essay. Many of us, I'm guessing, can relate so well to the complex emotions these items bring, and why we hang on to them. Feeling sad for all of us! Thank you for describing it all so beautifully.
Beautifully written, Jenny. May you and your husband enjoy every moment those teenagers hang out in the new space. And when they leave (they will), you'll reclaim the space yet again. It's a good process, all this living, growing, changing we pursue. And we're better for it.
You're free, except for the chains that don't rust away. My father was a killer, who ended up a suicide, two facts that never sank in to my cousins - I have no siblings. One cousin, with whom I keep a conversation going, still says, "Yes, but he was always nice to me." I wrote this up recently. It's in the latest Dorothy Parker's Ashes. Flesh of his flesh. At least that cousin still keeps in touch with me. And I like that and like him!
Painful read. I'm so sorry, it all seems so petty, mean and selfish. I say toss it all. The company I worked for over 12 years pushed me out over political differences. I felt betrayed and in the next few months got rid of all and any gifts, swag, tshirts, mementos. All of it. I didn't need reminders taking up space. Instead, I made space for good things to come in...do it.
Jenny, I know I thanked you privately but I also wanted to publicly thank you for being so bold and honest here. You didn’t have to, and I hope writing about it offers at least one form of letting go, whatever you do with the gifts.
What a powerful essay. Many of us, I'm guessing, can relate so well to the complex emotions these items bring, and why we hang on to them. Feeling sad for all of us! Thank you for describing it all so beautifully.
Beautifully written, Jenny. May you and your husband enjoy every moment those teenagers hang out in the new space. And when they leave (they will), you'll reclaim the space yet again. It's a good process, all this living, growing, changing we pursue. And we're better for it.
You're free, except for the chains that don't rust away. My father was a killer, who ended up a suicide, two facts that never sank in to my cousins - I have no siblings. One cousin, with whom I keep a conversation going, still says, "Yes, but he was always nice to me." I wrote this up recently. It's in the latest Dorothy Parker's Ashes. Flesh of his flesh. At least that cousin still keeps in touch with me. And I like that and like him!
Painful read. I'm so sorry, it all seems so petty, mean and selfish. I say toss it all. The company I worked for over 12 years pushed me out over political differences. I felt betrayed and in the next few months got rid of all and any gifts, swag, tshirts, mementos. All of it. I didn't need reminders taking up space. Instead, I made space for good things to come in...do it.
What an interesting analogy to workplace relationships, which can feel like family (or at least very close friendships).
Great story. I think you’d find mine intriguing. https://johnmoyermedlpcncc.substack.com/p/why-some-ghosts-refuse-to-be-summarized?utm_campaign=post-expanded-share&utm_medium=web
Jenny, I know I thanked you privately but I also wanted to publicly thank you for being so bold and honest here. You didn’t have to, and I hope writing about it offers at least one form of letting go, whatever you do with the gifts.
This is all so familiar to me. The details are different. The dynamics the same. I'm looking forward to the anthology.
Beautifully put into words. Like they always say: you can’t choose your family, but you tried and that’s all you can ever do 🌹
I completely understand that ambiguous grief.